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Tina's new daily ritual in the morning is to soak in the sun while cleaning herself and sleeping. What a life...

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A New Outlook on Motherhood & Life

Before having children, I hated children.  I couldn’t understand them, and found them incredibly annoying.  I never gave a second thought to being a mom unlike some who aspire to be one their whole lives.  One day, I would become a mom after marriage and that would be that.  The only fact I knew for sure was that I definitely wanted to have more than one   child.  Being an only child, I recognized the importance of giving the gift of a sibling to my first. Approaching motherhood going on four years now with two babes has given me new perspective on what it’s all about. I’ve been asked before on the merits of becoming a mom or having children, and while it’s easy to complain about all the difficult parts, it has always been insurmountable to fully put into words the gravity or the magnitude of such a decision on my life.  Obviously, people say, children bring such joy and a newness to life that you have left behind in your childhood or forgott...

1 + 1 = X_X

After bath shenanigans Going from one child to two has got to be the toughest in my opinion.  Lucas thought going from 0 to 1 was more shocking since everything was so new and different.  But, for me, I knew that my whole life would be turned upside down once we had a child, so I had zero expectations.  It's not that I had expectations this time around, but we already had certain patterns and established relationships as a family of three.  I loved being Ethan's mom.  Although he drove me insane with his tantrums, I relished picking out his clothes, dressing him, brushing his teeth, bathing him, and especially, putting him to bed with books and lullabies.  I wanted to be there for him at the start and end of his days.  I wanted to be able to anticipate his every thought and desire before he needed to express it.  I wanted to be the best mom I could ever be. Shortly before Leila was due, about a month or two out, I realized th...

Alll the feeeels

Raising a baby is difficult.  It's hands-down, the most difficult job I've ever signed up for.  But, with one smile, giggle, or snuggle, and my heart has melted into those little baby hands.  Lately, I've often looked at him and wondered, how did you grow up so fast?  Why are your baby rolls slowly disappearing?  How do you have my eyes?  Being a mom is weird.  It's like you see yourself in a little human that you've created and raised.  At the same time, he's completely his own human with his own little feelings and thoughts.  Ethan is constantly on the move these days, ready to explore the world.  So, last night, as I was rocking him to sleep for the night, I held him close to me, smelled his babyness, and kissed his cheek; Relishing that moment of him just being a baby for however long he'll let me. a blurry, grainy, but perfect shot from this past Sunday