Ethan has finally cut his first tooth! It's been three weeks already, and it actually has come up quite a bit. I was feeding him dinner with my fingers, and felt something very sharp. It was difficult to see the top of the tooth that's coming out because he's always moving, but it's easier to see now that it has poked out more. He never had a fever, but did start coming down with a cold around the time the tooth came in. But, I'm not sure if it's teething-related since the babies in daycare were also sick around that time. I'm eager for him to get more teeth, so that he can start chewing more solids. Hopefully he doesn't get more pain from them though!
Having a second child has been more difficult for me than expected. I was not prepared for the heartache of what literally felt like a breaking up or falling out with the love of my life: my first born. I had not read about this in any blogs, vlogs, or anything. I mean, I had read about the difficulty of managing your time between two kids, but no one mentioned how difficult it would be to step back from your obsession with your first and only child to love another. It did make me resent my time alone with Leila a bit in the beginning because that meant Ethan was off having fun with daddy while I was stuck at home sustaining a newborn. My first love was learning about a life beyond mama. It felt like knife wounds to the heart. This is how I came to realize what it really means to sacrifice. I willingly give up something that I hold so dear and close to my heart for the sake of someone else. It hurts and it is an uphill battle to try...
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